| Witness This, Jehovah!! |
| NOTICE: Readers who offended at humor which pokes fun at people and their religious beliefs are warned not to read this article. If on the other hand you like that sort of thing... read on! |
| Charlotte, NC 3/1/98 - This morning, an ominous looking, dark colored van stopped at the end of our cul-da-sac. It's windows tinted so dark it was impossible to see in. Within minutes, the doors opened and 12 people emerged. All were neatly dressed, men wearing suits, women is dresses and all carrying brief cases. Like a swarm of locusts and smiling from ear to ear, Jehovah and his Band of Witnesses began their assault on Blue Sky Lane. |
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As they approached my
neighbor's homes, I could clearly see blinds and curtains being drawn
tight as if to give the appearance of a vacant house. I on the other
hand took a different tact. I saw an opportunity! Grabbing my digital camera, I swung open the front door just as these pious pitchmen reached for the bell. Before they could show me the cover of Awake magazine, I surprised them by snapping the pictures. |
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In the blink of an eye these
two emissaries from God launched into their religious pitch trying to save
me from eternal damnation. I tried close my door but it was all in
vain. Nothing I said or did would deter these evangelical saviors of
the world. Finally, feeling like I had no other choice, I just
slammed the door in their faces.
Two minutes later the must have figured I wasn't coming back out. They left my house went to visited my neighbor Sal. Poor Sal! |